"I just want to be alone," she said as she snipped away at my hair. "It's so much easier to be single."
"Yeah," I agreed, "but who wants to be 70 and alone?"
"I do," she said.
I get that. But as a fellow introvert, I wanted to tell her that her viewpoint might change. That there's something about having the support of a significant other ... And that's what I think I am missing right now, hence the nostalgia for Bill. I miss having someone solidly in my corner and soon enough I'll miss the sex, too, and will be off on the hunt for a new man. (Oh cruel biology! Because it would be easier to be single, it would.)
There's something about having someone in your life that gives life a sharper sense of purpose.
Match.com might be getting some more of my hard-earned dollars soon, dammit.
Pros and cons to both sides -- absolutely. I was just discussing this with a friend today -- we both had a few good stories of late (buildup of sexual tension, juggling various guys, etc), and she said, "this IS so much more fun than just being with one person, isn't it?"
ReplyDeleteI agreed, to an extent. It's also nice to have that fabulous guy who will make you dinner (or order in for you) when you've had a bad day, as well as have an amazing guy look at you in *that* special way. I miss that.
BTW, if you do go back on Match, CALL them, rather than sign up online -- you should be able to get a discounted rate.
I too face this dilemma every single day. Too many of my married friends are still married out of convenience and financial reasons only. I gather that many people are in relationships with people who are no longer suited to them - it happened after 21 years in my marriage. It IS easier being single than living with someone who no longer looks at you in *that* special way, but I miss the support and intimacy and the love. I'm still of a mind that no man is better than the wrong man, but after a year of no sex, will I cave in and settle for an OK man again?
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